bekstek:

mintike:

IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL NAMED “the fresh prince of denmark yo holla”

oh man, i love receiving unedited final drafts:

cracks me up every time

hijerking:

i’m the brother

bonerfart:

news headline: Studies Show Millenials Wipe Their Ass More Than Any Other Generation

someone in the comments: LOL did they develop an app for ass wiping now? Let me tell you something about the real world kids, it’s hard to find the time to wipe every time you have to go potty when you have a job and responsibilities! Sorry liberal loons, this asshole is not a “safe space”!

tsuki-dono-7:

Dropping hints to your crush

crazyseandx:

thomas-sanders-with-vine:

It Might Be a Problem… 💬

Never thought about it that way.

trippingthelight:

cozi:

when i was 12 i got banned from yahoo answers and when i emailed support to be like “what did i do??” i got a really vague answer that just said “you know what you did” and it still haunts me to this day

When I was 10 I was in a AOL chatroom for kids and we were all making this Homer Simpson face (8^(|) but this one girl Crystal forgot to put the nose in the face so I said “You forgot the nose crystal” and I immediately got booted offline and no one in my family could log on. My Mom talked to someone from AOL and they said I was trying to sell drugs to minors because I said “nose crystal”

dexfiles:

here is a star for everyone who’s not feeling their best today (🌟)

dark-astrology:

i’ve been laughing for half an hour

kissesformabitches:

they was talking real shit back then and i took it as a joke

ladyflowdi:

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

blackphoenix1977:

pleatedjeans:

Three cheers for these guys [x]

This is how to be a good ally.

Using their Bro-ness for good, not evil

So a tiny story: on Black Friday a few weeks ago I went to Gamestop to buy my brother a game for Christmas, and I noticed this older man was watching me like a hawk. He was loitering around the front of the store without really buying anything, and every time I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye he was looking at me. I went to look at the PS4 games, and he was looking at something right behind me. I checked out the Nintendo games, and he was looking at them too. I was the only woman in the store, by the way.

By the time I got in line to pay he was loitering at the front of the store again, and I just had that feeling that he was going to try and take the game I just bought, or steal my purse, as soon as I left the store. OR, he was going to try and follow me home. And I know I don’t have to explain that terror to any woman reading this, but all I could think was that I’m in this Gamestop alone with at least twenty other men and something is about to happen. I’m beginning to freak out, to the point where I’ve just pulled my pepper spray out of my purse and into the pocket of my coat. 

So there I am, next in line to pay, and there is this GIGANTIC dudebro right behind me, and I say gigantic as a 6 foot tall woman. He says, “Ma’am? Don’t be offended, but would it be alright if I walked you to your car?” and I was like “Are you serious?” and he was like “There are some weird guys in here right now. Have you noticed that guy watching you?” and then I showed the dudebro the pepper spray in my pocket and he was like “Right on. Would you still let me walk you to your car?” and I said yes.

So I paid, and waited while HE paid, and he walked me to my car. And just as I was getting in, the weird guy who’d been loitering came out of the store, saw me and my dudebro, and turned around and walked away in the opposite direction. 

In short: men who recognize that women are unsafe in dark alleys, college campuses, grocery stores, gas stations and retail stores and do something about it are the kind of quality men that this world needs more of.